Single ? Do you really want to start a new relationship but sometimes you wonder if it’s the right time or not? Certain signs can now give you indications.
Are you ready for a new relationship?
“You’ll meet someone when you’re ready”: we’ve all heard this phrase… sometimes a bit annoying, it must be said! Especially since we generally feel ready when we start talking about it.
In fact, sometimes appearances are deceiving. Certain signs can therefore put us on the alert. The psychopractitioner Géraldyne Prévot-Gigant, specialist in the question of romantic relationships, helps us to decipher them. The Leenkus editorial staff takes stock!
Relationship: comparison or benchmark?
“If you compare the men you meet to your ex, it is an element that shows that you are held back by the past,” says Géraldyne Prévot-Gigant. In fact, telling yourself that “my ex would have done this or that in this situation”, or that the new one likes the same music and rolls up his glasses the same way … shows that our old relationship is also present in our head.
Besides, there is a risk of unconsciously looking for the same type of person. This even when we say the opposite. “The page is not turned, the previous relationship is not evacuated”, assures the specialist. “But we must differentiate this attitude from that where we consider the ex as a point of reference: there, we know, thanks to our previous relationships, what we want and what we no longer want. She also adds.
Be available… or not!
Being ready for a new relationship also means being available. And if this is not the case internally, it will be seen in the facts!
“Some people say they want to meet someone, but when a romantic date is possible, they are never available: they always have something more urgent to do, are late, cancel for various reasons… adds Géraldyne Prévot-Gigant. In fact, if this is indeed your case, and even if your reasons seem good to you… Then ask yourself if this is not the sign of a more unconscious refusal.
Be available… or not!
Sometimes we tend to rely on a new relationship to go well. Even if it’s not explicitly stated. “We are then looking for the man who will bring a ray of sunshine into our lives, warmth, a feeling of security, thanks to which everything will go well again,” says the specialist.
Indeed, for fear of being alone, we sometimes think of bringing someone into our life to fill an empty space. “It creates a feeling of urgency, of tension in meeting someone… quite different from availability, from openness to a new possibility”, specifies Géraldyne Prévot-Gigant.
First of all to avoid bad surprises… It is therefore better to take a look at yourself, to understand what needs to be appeased and what remains to be healed.
Anger not always conscious
A generally negative opinion on the male sex is not a sign of availability either! “Fairly typical of women who have lived, who have suffered, we sometimes hear anger, but also fairly strong ideas about men, generalizations…”, explains the specialist.
Before specifying: “These women say that they want to start a new relationship but by remaining stuck in their anger, sometimes unconsciously, they do not give a chance to a possible meeting”. From now on, work on oneself must help to sort things out.
